I've been married for over a year now. I am 29, and so is my wife. Naturally, the question of kids has come up. She doesn't want them right now, but her clock is definitely ticking. Three years ago, when we started dating, I said that maybe I'd want kids when I am 30. It seemed reasonable, and it also seemed like a long way away. Now that I will be 30 is 11 months and counting, I can confidently say that I am no more ready for a child today than I was three years ago, and perhaps even less ready.
I was talking with my old friend Russ about this, as he is in a similar predicament. Neither of us really wants kids. I suggested that the reason many people want kids is because of vanity, in that they have some desire to pass on their genes. I have no such desire, although I am confident I'd produce a kick-ass child. I just don't see it as a necessity. My world doesn't hinge on producing offspring. Russ suggested that people have kids because they hear they'd like it. I, however, have no illusions about liking it.
Here are the seven problems I have with potential fatherhood.
1) Money. Right now, I work, and so does my wife. We have disposable income. For the most part, if we want something we buy it. If we want to go somewhere, we go. It's a nice way to live. But with a kid, that will disappear. My wife will work less. Extra money will go to stuff like diapers and strollers. That's not cool
2) Convenience. Now, if my wife and I want to go out to dinner or the store or the movies, we hop in the car and go. With a kid, we'd have to either a) get a baby sitter, or b) take it with us. Either option is a pain in the ass and kind of ruins the point in going somewhere to begin with.
3) Sleep. I like to sleep. Specifically, I like to sleep during the night. If I am awoken during the night, I get really really pissed. From what I hear, babies cry during the night. I cannot sleep when there is crying. That shit ain't cool.
4) Appeal. I just don't see it. If I see a cute kid, my reaction is the same as when I see a kitten. I think it's cute, but also that I don't want one. On the flip side, when I see, for example, a puppy, I want one. Kids need to market themselves better, because I'm not interested.
5) Self-Centeredness. I fully admit, I am self-centered. Having a kid would not be conducive to continued self-centeredness.
6) Diapers. I have never once changed a diaper. I watched it happen recently. It was fucking disgusting. I don't plan on changing any diapers. This will not make my wife happy. It's a lose-lose situation.
7) Kids shows. I have seen some of them. They are retarded. If I came home from work and had to watch Dora the Explorer instead of Seinfeld reruns, well, I would probably resent the kid. I like my shows.
So in light of all that, if someone can tell me why I should want to be a dad, please email me. initbutnotofit@gmail.com
I was talking with my old friend Russ about this, as he is in a similar predicament. Neither of us really wants kids. I suggested that the reason many people want kids is because of vanity, in that they have some desire to pass on their genes. I have no such desire, although I am confident I'd produce a kick-ass child. I just don't see it as a necessity. My world doesn't hinge on producing offspring. Russ suggested that people have kids because they hear they'd like it. I, however, have no illusions about liking it.
Here are the seven problems I have with potential fatherhood.
1) Money. Right now, I work, and so does my wife. We have disposable income. For the most part, if we want something we buy it. If we want to go somewhere, we go. It's a nice way to live. But with a kid, that will disappear. My wife will work less. Extra money will go to stuff like diapers and strollers. That's not cool
2) Convenience. Now, if my wife and I want to go out to dinner or the store or the movies, we hop in the car and go. With a kid, we'd have to either a) get a baby sitter, or b) take it with us. Either option is a pain in the ass and kind of ruins the point in going somewhere to begin with.
3) Sleep. I like to sleep. Specifically, I like to sleep during the night. If I am awoken during the night, I get really really pissed. From what I hear, babies cry during the night. I cannot sleep when there is crying. That shit ain't cool.
4) Appeal. I just don't see it. If I see a cute kid, my reaction is the same as when I see a kitten. I think it's cute, but also that I don't want one. On the flip side, when I see, for example, a puppy, I want one. Kids need to market themselves better, because I'm not interested.
5) Self-Centeredness. I fully admit, I am self-centered. Having a kid would not be conducive to continued self-centeredness.
6) Diapers. I have never once changed a diaper. I watched it happen recently. It was fucking disgusting. I don't plan on changing any diapers. This will not make my wife happy. It's a lose-lose situation.
7) Kids shows. I have seen some of them. They are retarded. If I came home from work and had to watch Dora the Explorer instead of Seinfeld reruns, well, I would probably resent the kid. I like my shows.
So in light of all that, if someone can tell me why I should want to be a dad, please email me. initbutnotofit@gmail.com
